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Read it all the way through! It’s a good laugh!

When I bought my Blackberry, I thought about the 30-year business I ran with 1800 employees, all without a cell phone that plays music, takes videos, pictures and communicates with Facebook and Twitter. I signed up under duress for Twitter and Facebook, so my seven kids, their spouses, 13 grand kids and 2 great grand kids could communicate with me in the modern way. I figured I could handle something as simple as Twitter with only 140 characters of space.

That was before one of my grandkids hooked me up for Tweeter, Tweetree, Twhirl, Twitterfon, Tweetie and Twittererific Tweetdeck, Twitpix and something that sends every message to my cell phone and every other program within the texting World.

My phone was beeping every three minutes with the details of everything except the bowel movements of the entire next generation. I am not ready to live like this. I keep my cell phone in the garage in my golf bag.

The kids bought me a GPS for my last birthday because they say I get lost every now and then going over to the grocery store or library. I keep that in a box under my tool bench with the Blue tooth [it’s red] phone I am supposed to use when I drive. I wore it once and was standing in line at Barnes and Noble talking to my wife and everyone in the nearest 50 yards was glaring at me. I had to take my hearing aid out to use it, and I got a little loud.

I mean the GPS looked pretty smart on my dash board, but the lady inside that gadget was the most annoying, rudest person I had run into in a long time. Every 10 minutes, she would sarcastically say, “Re-calc-u-lating.” You would think that she could be nicer. It was like she could barely tolerate me. She would let go with a deep sigh and then tell me to make a U-turn at the next light. Then if I made a right turn instead. Well, it was not a good relationship..
When I get really lost now, I call my wife and tell her the name of the cross streets and while she is starting to develop the same tone as Gypsy, the GPS lady, at least she loves me.

To be perfectly frank, I am still trying to learn how to use the cordless phones in our house. We have had them for 4 years, but I still haven’t figured out how I can lose three phones all at once and have to run around digging under chair cushions and checking bathrooms and the dirty laundry baskets when the phone rings.

The world is just getting too complex for me. They even mess me up every time I go to the grocery store. You would think they could settle on something themselves but this sudden “Paper or Plastic?” every time I check out just knocks me for a loop. I bought some of those cloth reusable bags to avoid looking confused, but I never remember to take them with me.

Now I toss it back to them. When they ask me, “Paper or Plastic?” I just say, “Doesn’t matter to me. I am bi-sacksual.” Then it’s their turn to stare at me with a blank look. I was recently asked if I tweet. I answered, No, but I do fart a lot.”

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  • ::Millen has a way of opening up conversations that not only make you feel safe to talk about money, but her questions have been so profound that they have made immediate shifts in my mindset and my circumstances have changed almost immediately too, including more money showing up, but more importantly, more and more opportunities.  I have found new and inspired direction, and am feeling a lot more peaceful and excited about life in general. Millen offers so much value and a solid advice! She is a big picture thinker and it is infectious! Thank you, Millen, from the bottom of my heart and the top of my soul.

    ~ Renee Commins, Coach, Renee Commins Coaching

  • ::Millen Livis is a gift to humanity. Millen is very generous with her time and energy, sharing her vast life experiences and strengths, empowering me to become a better human being. Millen has impacted my life spiritually, emotionally, physically and financially, by her encouragement and clarity. I have not said, “Thank you!” enough.

    ~ Heidi Stefan, B.A. Detox Support Counselor, Archstone Recovery Center of the Palm Beaches, Inc.

  • ::Millen brings together an interesting mix of feminine wisdom, clear logic, assertiveness and humility in all of her interactions. With her warmth, intelligence, diverse experience and passion for ‘Dare to be the best you could be’ message, she inspires other women to reach for the goals they set for themselves.

    ~ Sharon Keller, Golden Bear Realty, LLC

  • ::Using laser like energy, Millen gives her full attention to your issue and stays with it until a satisfactory resolution or conclusion is reached. Open minded, yet direct and honest, Millen balances objectivity with compassion. It is a joy to work with her!

    ~ Mary L. Holden, Freelance Editor and Writer

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