Dare to Change Life Coaching & Mentoring

Tag: peace of mind

  • What Really Matters in Life and How to Write Your Dreams into Existence

    What Really Matters in Life and How to Write Your Dreams into Existence

    I am fortunate to live very close to the ocean and a small lake. As part of my daily self-care routine, I love taking walks on the beach or around the lake every morning.

    These walks have become my walking meditation practice.

    I like to pay attention to and appreciate simple things: birds having a tribe gathering, children playing in the sand, people jogging and walking, and seeing footprints get washed away by the rhythmic movements of the ocean waves.

    During one of my walks, my mind zoomed in on the washed footprints on the sand, and I thought: That is a symbolic image of our lives.

    We, too, leave a footprint as a proof of our existence on the physical plane. Then one day our “footprint” will be erased in an instant and we’ll return back to our Divine Source.

    Suddenly, the brevity of our existence struck my awareness.

    I realized that all the worries and struggles, fears and pains, physical possessions, and material achievements that we identify with are not our identity but simply passing experiences along our journey.

    Then what remains?

    What is lasting?

    Love, grace, kindness, and joyful memories you share with others are the legacy that you can leave behind one day.

    If you are like me – ambitious and constantly driven by new and exciting ideas and projects – you are motivated by the desire to authentically serve others with your talents and skills.

    In my case, this passion and drive helped me achieve freedom and independence, and I am infinitely grateful for my life.

    Yet I often push myself and multitask to the point of exhaustion.

    I get caught up in busyness, which is a self-created illusion, and overlook the real priorities.

    In the instant that I was watching the footprints get washed away, however, I felt that I truly want to refocus on what really matters in life, especially in the midst of busyness.

    I want to focus on what makes me feel good: love, joy, grace, deep connections, and inner peace. And from THAT place, I will create my training masterpieces and make a bigger impact in the world.

    Today I want to share with you a fun exercise I like to do to plan an extraordinary year and invite you to try it too.

    Create a list of

    1. Your wins – all the successful outcomes or efforts, whether tangible or immaterial. This will help you focus on your successes and expand on them.
    2. Your pains – habits, beliefs, people and experiences that I want to leave behind. Create this list, then burn it as a symbol of releasing this energy from your life.
    3. Your lessons – feedback, experiences, people and beliefs that I want to expand and bring over to the next year. We tend to repeat the lessons that we haven’t learned. Awareness of these lessons will help you get to desired goals faster.
    4. Your goals – what do you want to FEEL and EXPERIENCE, CREATE, GIVE and RECEIVE. Clarity about your desires will help your subconscious to zoom in on your goals and manifest them.

    Take some time for yourself and write your dreams into existence!

    Have a magical New Year!

    Until then… STAY IN YOUR POWER!

     

     

    Millen

    P.S. To start pre-paving your way to Wealth and Financial Freedom, make sure to download your FREE Wealth Planner HERE 

     

  • Looking For a Shortcut to Success? Here Is What I Discovered!

    Looking For a Shortcut to Success? Here Is What I Discovered!

    “Perhaps the oldest working  truth of self-discovery is that the only way out is through. That we are returned repeatedly to the same circumstance is not always a sign of avoidance, but can mean our work around a certain issue is not done.” ~ Mark Nepo

    Would you like to get a shortcut, a straight line to success and happiness in life?

    Wouldn’t it be nice to just get such secret remedy and skip all the pain, doubts, struggles and learning curves?

    It would be, right?

    Unfortunately, there is no such secret remedy. Life is about growth and expansion and most of your growth as a spiritual being occurs when you experience challenges, uncover your true priorities and values, and discover the most important relationship in your life – relationship with your SELF.

    I know so many amazingly talented, intelligent and really wonderful people – men and women – who, at some point in their lives, felt lost, confused and experienced what I call a Divine crisis.

    It’s an interesting phenomenon when suddenly your heart, body, mind and soul get completely out of sync.

    Somehow the harmony that you experienced as a child, when everything felt exciting and possible, fades away and your body, heart, mind and spirit create a cacophony effect that you may experience as a painful struggle, self-judgement, uncertainty, and loss of direction.

    I experienced this effect in my own life and witnessed it in people of different age groups from all walks of life. Many of them appeared to be quite successful and had no apparent reason to experience such crisis.

    Sadly, when you go through the Divine crisis, it doesn’t really matter that you have people who love and support you, that you are smart and accomplished, that you have so many things to be grateful for.

    It feels like some unknown strong forces create havoc in your inner world and all the repressed emotions, self-doubts, judgements, and fears suddenly come together in a perfect storm with you in the middle of it.

    For some women I know such experience coincided with (or was triggered by?) a breakdown of important relationships, loss of loved ones, or dealing with cancer. Others experienced such Divine crisis after losing a job, going through financial ruins or feeling stuck in their current career. Yet others didn’t have any apparent triggers, it simply happened…

    So what’s underneath of it? Why are you subjected to such experience?

    I have come to believe that we are destined to live more authentically – either by erosion of external circumstances or by inner discomfort.

    Most of us are so achievement-driven and unconsciously competitive that the illusion of external success and happiness becomes the driving force.

    This force ultimately leads us to doing more, having more and not giving enough space for being more. Yes, we chase after things that we believe can ‘complete us’ while missing out on simple miracles that surround us and are part of our everyday life – music, flowers, children’s laugh, sunrises and sunsets…

    I am writing this as someone who herself experienced such Divine crisis. My friends and loved ones couldn’t understand fully what was ‘wrong’ with me – I was young, smart, healthy and successful (in modern cultural terms).

    Yet inside I felt unease, confusion and guilt. I couldn’t understand why I was experiencing these emotions, why I felt so lost after so many achievements.

    My body, heart, mind and spirit were out of harmony and no external forces were able to ‘fix me’ – I needed to go through the motion of unfolding my way to authentic living.

    I’ve realized that there is no ‘success formula’ I could apply to shorten this unfolding – I had to learn how to SURRENDER TO MY TRUTH.

    I had to allow myself to experience the deeper side of me, to FEEL the sadness, disappointments, losses, and doubts. I had to allow fear of uncertainty to burn itself out and just to stay open to all my experiences.

    During this time I, a notorious multi-tasker, had to take time off and get still to heal from inside.

    It was a truly humbling experience… It made me more compassionate toward myself and others, more aware of my inner power, and more appreciative of the inherent joy of simple things in life.

    If you go through the Divine crisis that resembles anything like I described here, I invite you to allow yourself time and space to go through its motion without rushing, or pushing, or judging. Make time to get still, scan your body and determine where exactly you experience your deeply covered emotions.

    Bring these emotions to your awareness. Don’t suppress your feelings, experience them without trying to label, judge or change them.

    Finally, when you feel ready, send grace and unconditional love to the area of your body that stores these feelings. Keep going through this self-healing process as long as you need to.

    You may be called to go through this experience longer than you’d like to…

    It may take a while, it may not happen as rapidly as you would want it to pass.

    Don’t get discouraged – you will get to the point where your perspective will shift to a softer, more loving and resilient outlook and you will again experience the inner harmony and joy of living and creating.

    The experience of Divine crisis made me realize that our most challenging and painful experiences become our best credentials for helping others.

    Yes, I know that my business acumen, investing experience and degrees in physics and business administration are important credentials.

    Yet it is my experience of Divine crisis that felt like a deadly roller coaster the first time, made me more compassionate, loving and humble.

    It also helped me realize my purpose – helping entrepreneurial women release their inner blocks, manage money effectively and invest strategically so that they too develop their unique pathway to Freedom!

    To Your Health Wealth and Freedom!

     

     

    Millen

    p.s. Download your FREE Wealth Planner HERE

  • Competing Financial Priorities: 3 Human Biases About Money

    Competing Financial Priorities: 3 Human Biases About Money

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    I recently saw the statistics that 60 % of baby boomers are more afraid of running out of money in their retirement than they are afraid of death. Millennials are buying cryptocurrencies, often using their credit cards, with hopes of become overnight millionaires.

    Over 70% of businesses fail within the first 5 years because of cash flow problems.

    From my personal experience and observations, awareness of your money habits, planning your financial future, and having financial discipline are the most critical factors for creating a comfortable retirement.

    As Robert Kiyosaki once said, “It’s not how much money you make that matters most, but how much money you keep. How hard it works for you and how many generations you keep it for.”

    Making a good living does not automatically put you in the “more than enough” or “affluent” category. Because it’s not just about how much you earn but also what you do with what you earn. Do I hear “Yes”?

    Now let’s go over different ways you can choose to manage your competing financial priorities.

    If you want to become financially independent, one of the most important skills you must acquire is managing your money intentionally, so that regardless of your current income, you become richer every month and every year.

    How do you accomplish this?

    By managing your competing financial priorities while saving and growing your money.

    When it comes to managing your financial priorities, it’s a good idea to be aware of the three human biases that may affect you financial choices and decisions.

    1. The Present Bias

    As a human being, you are wired to take care of immediate needs first, making sure your essential requirements for food, shelter and security are met. So it’s understandable that when current, short-term financial needs and goals compete for your attention, saving for the future gets neglected. For example, when you focus on car and home repairs, your kids’ day-care or private school, or a new heating/cooling system, your long-term savings for big purchases such as education, financial emergencies, or retirement go to the back burner.

    The famous Hierarchy of Human Needs by psychologist Abraham Maslow outlines the progression of human needs and human awareness as we ascend from meeting our immediate survival needs to the need to feel fulfilled and self-actualized.

    We like to say: “Live in the moment”, right?

    Right, but not when it comes to your money; with money you must be intentional.

    Most people have difficulty envisioning distant events. It’s easy to envision, associate with and express immediate financial needs. This is something that financial professionals refer to as “the present bias.” The “present bias” makes you handle competing financial goals by assigning your highest priority to immediate needs and nearest goals, and overlooking the long-term financial priorities.

    1. The Availability Bias

    The availability bias is another mental pitfall when you are very comfortable with your current available income and assume that you will always have it. So, why bother thinking about long term financial goals?

    While this bias pertains to all humans, it’s especially common among new entrepreneurs and famous sports figures, who often go through feast/famine experiences and some end-up in financial ruin. Many of the currently well-off folks treat their businesses or contracts as their piggy banks that are available to cover any and all desires.

    1. The Busy-bee Bias

    The busy-bee bias is very common among highly paid professionals who are so busy making money that they don’t make time to plan how they can grow it, let alone how they can make their money work for them!

    These people rely heavily on the easily available information and often don’t do their due diligence on the accuracy of the advice and integrity of the source from which they receive their financial advice. As the result, they put more value on the easily available solutions rather than more strategic ones and end up disappointed.

    The tendencies and biases I have mentioned often cause people to spend everything they are currently earning. They want to enjoy their money to the fullest while they can, or save and invest first for their family’s educational goals, rather than diversifying their savings across different financial priorities like planning their financial future, retirement, health-related needs, and creating financial independence.

    More often than not, goals like buying a new car or a house, financing private school or college tuition for your kids, become top priorities relative to retirement or financial independence goals. However, you don’t want to burden your kids by depending on their financial support when you get older, right?

    So, how can you manage competing financial priorities, the immediate and the upcoming ones? The solution may be as simple as asking yourself if the financial priorities you’re focusing on now are really the most important ones, given your overall goals in life, not only your immediate needs.

    Here are two simple questions you can ask yourself:

    1. What are my short and long term priorities in life?
    2. What are my core values that help me experience more joy and fulfillment in life?

    The answers to these questions will help you sort out your financial priorities.

    For example, one of my core values is FREEDOM. I can be content driving an older car, leading a modest lifestyle and wearing stylish but not necessarily designer clothes and shoes. However, I am willing to do whatever it takes to achieve financial independence so that I can have the Freedom of Choice in my life.

    Now, pause and write down answers to the two questions above.

    Share your experiences in the comments.  I would love to know how you manage your competing financial priorities.

    And here’s the recording of the mini-class on this topic

    To Your Health, Wealth, and Freedom!

    Millen